Tuesday, December 3, 2013

For the Girls

I write about boys in my room a lot. Especially those SSB's. I think it's because I'm the mom of two boys and grandma to four more.

But, I do love those girls.

When our first grandchild was born, I couldn't wait to buy everything in pink. I envisioned Barbie dolls and baby dolls, dress up clothes and dance costumes.  I couldn't wait for the giggles and hair ribbons, tea parties and shopping.

And I got all that.

And then I started teaching high school. I see too many girls who sit back and giggle and think it's cute to be stupid (Yes. I know that's not a nice word. But no other word will do. Really. You should see some really smart girls be dumb just so a boy will like them). I see girls who screech and giggle over a bug or pretend they are grossed out when it comes to dissection in Biology. Then they let the big, strong cute boy do all the work. Arrrrrggggghhhhhhh.

And then I read Ruth's post about one of her daughters. I loved it! I love girls who are strong and independent. They are sometimes harder to connect with, but they are so worth the effort. As I read Ruth's post, I thought of several girls I have in class right now. They speak their mind, but only if what they have to say is worthwhile. They tend to ignore the immaturity going on around them. Then I thought about my improv girls. Improv tends to be male dominated, but not in our school. My girls get out there and "wrestle alligators" And I realized, I need to make sure all these girls learn more than different shades of pink.

I want them to be confident enough in what they know to try new things and not be afraid to "fail".

I want them to know the JOY of a job well done, the satisfaction of learning how to do something for themselves and maybe even "bragging" about it a little bit.

I want them to know you don't need a boyfriend to be happy. Happiness comes from listening to that little voice inside you and doing what you enjoy, with people who enjoy it too.

Sometimes, boys are just friends and that's a good thing.

A couple of really good friends are worth more than a posse, but if you have the right posse, anything is possible

"Dumb" isn't cute.

Jump in and participate. Sitting on the sidelines and letting others take the spotlight won't get you anything.

Love stories are fiction. You don't get flowers and candy every day or even every week. There aren't always fireworks. Real love grows slow. A happy relationship takes a lot of hard work.

You really can do and be anything you want IF you work really, really hard.

I want them to shine their lights upon the world.....


  1. Arghhis right. And I see this happening to my strong, confident girls in 7th and 8th grade, when they turn into simpering idiots. Sigh. Bring on the bossy girls!

  2. They will shine their light because you showed them the way.

  3. This is an incredible list that every girl should read, Deb. The girls in your classroom are lucky to learn from you!!!

  4. Me too, Deb, me too. My daughter, who happens to be pretty, had a tough time in high school because she wouldn't play the game, was very smart, and the expectation of being a cheerleader just wasn't in her agenda. Not to say anything about cheerleaders-good athletes, but still expectations are so hard. I wish she would have had a teacher who valued smart girls. She did not. Thanks for being a good model!

  5. Love this post. Let's hear it for the girls who aren't afraid to be smart!

  6. My daughter thanks us all the time for not allowing her to be a princess. she says that is why she gets along so well with her brother and other boys.